Heandhismotherandthebaby，asicklyinfantofaboutfivemonthsold，livedinacellardownaturningoffThreeColtStreet。Iamnotquitesurewhathadbecomeofthefather。Iratherthinkhehadbeen"converted，"andhadgoneoffroundthecountryonapreachingtour。Theladearnedsixshillingsaweekasanerrand—boy；andthemotherstitchedtrousers，andondayswhenshewasfeelingstrongandenergeticwouldoftenmakeasmuchastenpence，orevenashilling。Unfortunately，thereweredayswhenthefourbarewallswouldchaseeachotherroundandround，andthecandleseemafaintspeckoflight，averylongwayoff；andthefrequencyofthesecausedthefamilyincomefortheweektooccasionallyfallsomewhatlow。
Onenightthewallsdancedroundquickerandquickertilltheydancedawayaltogether，andthecandleshotupthroughtheceilingandbecameastarandthewomanknewthatitwastimetoputawayhersewing。
"Jim，"shesaid：shespokeverylow，andtheboyhadtobendoverhertohear，"ifyoupokeaboutinthemiddleofthemattressyou’llfindacoupleofpounds。Isavedthemupalongwhileago。Thatwillpayforburyingme。And，Jim，you’lltakecareofthekid。
Youwon’tletitgototheparish。"
Jimpromised。
"Say’S’welpmeGawd，’Jim。"
"S’welpmeGawd，mother。"
Thenthewoman，havingarrangedherworldlyaffairs，laybackready，andDeathstruck。
Jimkepthisoath。Hefoundthemoney，andburiedhismother；andthen，puttinghishouseholdgoodsonabarrow，movedintocheaperapartments——halfanoldshed，forwhichhepaidtwoshillingsaweek。
Foreighteenmonthsheandthebabylivedthere。Heleftthechildatanurseryeverymorning，fetchingitawayeacheveningonhisreturnfromwork，andforthathepaidfourpenceaday，whichincludedalimitedsupplyofmilk。HowhemanagedtokeephimselfandmorethanhalfkeepthechildontheremainingtwoshillingsI
cannotsay。Ionlyknowthathedidit，andthatnotasouleverhelpedhimorknewthattherewashelpwanted。Henursedthechild，oftenpacingtheroomwithitforhours，washedit，occasionally，andtookitoutforanairingeverySunday。
Notwithstandingallwhichcare，thelittlebeggar，attheendofthetimeabovementioned，"peggedout，"touseJimmy’sownwords。
ThecoronerwasverysevereonJim。"Ifyouhadtakenpropersteps，"hesaid，"thischild’slifemighthavebeenpreserved。"（Heseemedtothinkitwouldhavebeenbetterifthechild’slifehadbeenpreserved。Coronershavequaintideas！）"Whydidn’tyouapplytotherelievingofficer？"
"’CosIdidn’twantnorelief，"repliedJimsullenly。"Ipromisedmymotheritshouldnevergoontheparish，anditdidn’t。"
Theincidentoccurred，veryluckily，duringthedeadseason，andtheeveningpaperstookthecaseup，andmaderatheragoodthingoutofit。Jimbecamequiteahero，Iremember。Kind—heartedpeoplewrote，urgingthatsomebody——thegroundlandlord，ortheGovernment，orsomeoneofthatsort——oughttodosomethingforhim。Andeverybodyabusedthelocalvestry。IreallythinksomebenefittoJimmighthavecomeoutofitallifonlytheexcitementhadlastedalittlelonger。Unfortunately，however，justatitsheightaspicydivorcecasecroppedup，andJimwascrowdedoutandforgotten。
Itoldtheboysthisstoryofmine，afterJephsonhaddonetellinghis，and，whenIhadfinished，wefounditwasnearlyoneo’clock。
So，ofcourse，itwastoolatetodoanymoreworktothenovelthatevening。
CHAPTERIV
Weheldournextbusinessmeetingonmyhouseboat。Brownwasopposedatfirsttomygoingdowntothishouseboatatall。Hethoughtthatnoneofusshouldleavetownwhilethenovelwasstillonhand。
MacShaughnassy，onthecontrary，wasofopinionthatweshouldworkbetteronahouseboat。Speakingforhimself，hesaidheneverfeltmorelikewritingareallygreatworkthanwhenlyinginahammockamongwhisperingleaves，withthedeepblueskyabovehim，andatumbleroficedclaretcupwithineasyreachofhishand。Failingahammock，hefoundadeckchairagreatincentivetomentallabour。
Intheinterestsofthenovel，hestronglyrecommendedmetotakedownwithmeatleastonecomfortabledeckchair，andplentyoflemons。
Icouldnotmyselfseeanyreasonwhyweshouldnotbeabletothinkaswellonahouseboatasanywhereelse，andaccordinglyitwassettledthatIshouldgodownandestablishmyselfuponthething，andthattheothersshouldvisitmetherefromtimetotime，whenwewouldsitroundandtoil。
ThishouseboatwasEthelbertha’sidea。Wehadspentaday，thesummerbefore，ononebelongingtoafriendofmine，andshehadbeenenrapturedwiththelife。Everythingwasonsuchadelightfullytinyscale。Youlivedinatinylittleroom；yousleptonatinylittlebed，inatiny，tinylittlebedroom；andyoucookedyourlittledinnerbyatinylittlefire，inthetiniestlittlekitchenthateveryoudidsee。"Oh，itmustbelovely，livingonahouseboat，"saidEthelbertha，withagaspofecstasy；"itmustbelikelivinginadoll’shouse。"
Ethelberthawasveryyoung——ridiculouslyyoung，asIthinkIhavementionedbefore——inthosedaysofwhichIamwriting，andtheloveofdolls，andofthegorgeousdressesthatdollswear，andofthemany—windowedbutinconvenientlyarrangedhousesthatdollsinhabit—
—oraresupposedtoinhabit，forasaruletheyseemtoprefersittingontheroofwiththeirlegsdanglingdownoverthefrontdoor，whichhasalwaysappearedtometobeunladylike：butthen，ofcourse，Iamnoauthorityondolletiquette——hadnotyet，I
think，quitedepartedfromher。Nay，amInotsurethatithadnot？
DoInotremember，yearslater，peepingintoacertainroom，thewallsofwhicharecoveredwithworksofartofacharactercalculatedtosendanyaestheticpersonmad，andseeingher，sittingonthefloor，beforearedbrickmansion，containingtworoomsandakitchen；andarenotherhandstremblingwithdelightasshearrangesthethreerealtinplatesuponthedresser？Anddoesshenotknockattherealbrassknockerupontherealfrontdooruntilitcomesoff，andIhavetositdownbesideheronthefloorandscrewitonagain？
Perhaps，however，itisunwiseformetorecallthesethings，andbringthemforwardthusinevidenceagainsther，forcannotsheinturnlaughatme？DidnotIalsoassistinthearrangementandappointmentofthathousebeautiful？Wedifferedonthematterofthedrawing—roomcarpet，Irecollect。Ethelberthafanciedadarkbluevelvet，butIfeltsure，takingthewall—paperintoconsideration，thatsomeshadeofterra—cottawouldharmonisebest。
Sheagreedwithmeintheend，andwemanufacturedoneoutofanoldchestprotector。Ithadareallycharmingeffect，andgaveadelightfullywarmtonetotheroom。Thebluevelvetweputinthekitchen。Ideemedthisextravagance，butEthelberthasaidthatservantsthoughtalotofagoodcarpet，andthatitpaidtohumourtheminlittlethings，whenpracticable。
Thebedroomhadonebigbedandacotinit；butIcouldnotseewherethegirlwasgoingtosleep。Thearchitecthadoverlookedheraltogether：thatissolikeanarchitect。Thehousealsosufferedfromtheinconveniencecommontoresidencesofitsclass，ofpossessingnostairs，sothattomovefromoneroomtoanotheritwasnecessarytoburstyourwayupthroughtheceiling，orelsetocomeoutsideandclimbinthroughawindow；eitherofwhichmethodsmustbefatiguingwhenyoucometodoitoften。
Apartfromthesedrawbacks，however，thehousewasonethatanydollagentwouldhavebeenjustifiedindescribingasa"mostdesirablefamilyresidence"；andithadbeenfurnishedwithalavishnessthatborderedonpositiveostentation。Inthebedroomtherewasawashing—stand，andonthewashing—standtherestoodajugandbasin，andinthejugtherewasrealwater。Butallthiswasasnothing。
Ihaveknownmereordinary，middle—classdolls’housesinwhichyoumightfindwashing—standsandjugsandbasinsandrealwater——ay，andevensoap。Butinthisabodeofluxurytherewasarealtowel；
sothatabodycouldnotonlywashhimself，butwipehimselfafterwards，andthatisasensationthat，asalldollsknow，canbeenjoyedonlyintheveryfirst—classestablishments。
Then，inthedrawing—room，therewasaclock，whichwouldtickjustsolongasyoucontinuedtoshakeit（itneverseemedtogettired）；
alsoapictureandapiano，andabookuponthetable，andavaseofflowersthatwouldupsetthemomentyoutouchedit，justlikearealvaseofflowers。Oh，therewasstyleaboutthisroom，Icantellyou。
Butthegloryofthehousewasitskitchen。Therewereallthingsthatheartcoulddesireinthiskitchen，saucepanswithlidsthattookonandoff，aflat—ironandarolling—pin。Adinnerserviceforthreeoccupiedabouthalftheroom，andwhatspacewasleftwasfilledupbythestove——aREALstove！Thinkofit，ohyeownersofdolls’houses，astoveinwhichyoucouldburnrealbitsofcoal，andonwhichyoucouldboilrealbitsofpotatofordinner——exceptwhenpeoplesaidyoumustn’t，becauseitwasdangerous，andtookthegrateawayfromyou，andblewoutthefire，athingthathampersacook。
Ineversawahousemorecompleteinallitsdetails。Nothinghadbeenoverlooked，noteventhefamily。Itlayonitsback，justoutsidethefrontdoor，proudbutcalm，waitingtobeputintopossession。Itwasnotanextensivefamily。Itconsistedoffour——
papa，andmamma，andbaby，andthehiredgirl；justthefamilyforabeginner。
Itwasawell—dressedfamilytoo——notmerelywithgrandclothesoutside，coveringashamefulconditionofthingsbeneath，suchas，alas！istoooftenthecaseindollsociety，butwitheveryarticlenecessaryandpropertoaladyorgentleman，downtoitemsthatI
couldnotmention。Andallthesegarments，youmustknow，couldbeunfastenedandtakenoff。Ihaveknowndolls——stylishenoughdolls，tolookat，someofthem——whohavebeencontenttogoaboutwiththeirclothesgummedontothem，and，insomecases，nailedonwithtacks，whichItaketobeaslovenlyandunhealthyhabit。Butthisfamilycouldbeundressedinfiveminutes，withouttheaidofeitherhotwaterorachisel。
Notthatitwasadvisablefromanartisticpointofviewthatanyofthemshould。Theyhadnotthefigurethatlookswellinitsnaturalstate——noneofthem。Therewasawantoffulnessaboutthemall。
Besides，withouttheirclothes，itmighthavebeendifficulttodistinguishthebabyfromthepapa，orthemaidfromthemistress，andthusdomesticcomplicationsmighthavearisen。
Whenallwasreadyfortheirreceptionweestablishedthemintheirhome。Weputasmuchofthebabytobedasthecotwouldhold，andmadethepapaandmammacomfortableinthedrawing—room，wheretheysatonthefloorandstaredthoughtfullyateachotheracrossthetable。（Theyhadtositonthefloorbecausethechairswerenotbigenough。）Thegirlweplacedinthekitchen，wheresheleantagainstthedresserinanattitudesuggestiveofdrink，embracingthebroomwehadgivenherwithmaudlinaffection。Thenweliftedupthehousewithcare，andcarrieditcautiouslyintoanotherroom，andwiththedeftnessofexperiencedconspiratorsplaceditatthefootofasmallbed，onthesouth—westcornerofwhichanabsurdlysmallsomebodyhadhunganabsurdlysmallstocking。
Toreturntoourowndoll’shouse，EthelberthaandI，discussingthesubjectduringourreturnjourneyinthetrain，resolvedthat，nextyear，weourselveswouldpossessahouseboat，asmallerhouseboat，ifpossible，thaneventheonewehadjustseen。Itshouldhaveart—muslincurtainsandaflag，andtheflowersaboutitshouldbewildrosesandforget—me—nots。Icouldworkallthemorningontheroof，withanawningovermetokeepoffthesun，whileEthelberthatrimmedtherosesandmadecakesfortea；andintheeveningswewouldsitoutonthelittledeck，andEthelberthawouldplaytheguitar（shewouldbeginlearningitatonce），orwecouldsitquietandlistentothenightingales。
For，whenyouarevery，veryyoungyoudreamthatthesummerisallsunnydaysandmoonlightnights，thatthewindblowsalwayssoftlyfromthewest，andthatroseswillthriveanywhere。But，asyougrowolder，yougrowtiredofwaitingforthegrayskytobreak。Soyouclosethedoorandcomein，andcrouchoverthefire，wonderingwhythewindsbloweverfromtheeast：andyouhavegivenuptryingtorearroses。
Iknewalittlecottagegirlwhosaveduphermoneyformonthsandmonthssoastobuyanewfrockinwhichtogotoaflower—show。
Butthedayoftheflower—showwasawetday，sosheworeanoldfrockinstead。Andallthefetedaysforquitealongwhilewerewetdays，andshefearedshewouldneverhaveachanceofwearingherprettywhitedress。Butatlasttherecameafetedaymorningthatwasbrightandsunny，andthenthelittlegirlclappedherhandsandranupstairs，andtookhernewfrock（whichhadbeenher"newfrock"forsolongatimethatitwasnowtheoldestfrockshehad）fromtheboxwhereitlayneatlyfoldedbetweenlavenderandthyme，andhelditup，andlaughedtothinkhowniceshewouldlookinit。
Butwhenshewenttoputiton，shefoundthatshehadout—grownit，andthatitwastoosmallforhereveryway。Soshehadtowearacommonoldfrockafterall。
Thingshappenthatway，youknow，inthisworld。Therewereaboyandgirloncewholovedeachotherverydearly。Buttheywerebothpoor，sotheyagreedtowaittillhehadmadeenoughmoneyforthemtolivecomfortablyupon，andthentheywouldmarryandbehappy。
Ittookhimalongwhiletomake，becausemakingmoneyisveryslowwork，andhewanted，whilehewasaboutit，tomakeenoughforthemtobeveryhappyuponindeed。Heaccomplishedthetaskeventually，however，andcamebackhomeawealthyman。
Thentheymetagaininthepoorly—furnishedparlourwheretheyhadparted。Buttheydidnotsitasneartoeachotherasofold。Forshehadlivedalonesolongthatshehadgrownold—maidish，andshewasfeelingvexedwithhimforhavingdirtiedthecarpetwithhismuddyboots。Andhehadworkedsolongearningmoneythathehadgrownhardandcoldlikethemoneyitself，andwastryingtothinkofsomethingaffectionatetosaytoher。
Soforawhiletheysat，oneeachsideofthepaper"fire—stoveornament，"bothwonderingwhytheyhadshedsuchscaldingtearsonthatdaytheyhadkissedeachothergood—bye；thensaid"good—bye"
again，andwereglad。
ThereisanothertalewithmuchthesamemoralthatIlearntatschooloutofacopy—book。IfIrememberrightly，itrunssomewhatlikethis：—
Onceuponatimetherelivedawisegrasshopperandafoolishant。
Allthroughthepleasantsummerweatherthegrasshoppersportedandplayed，gambollingwithhisfellowsinandoutamongthesun—beams，diningsumptuouslyeachdayonleavesanddew—drops，nevertroublingaboutthemorrow，singingeverhisonepeaceful，droningsong。
Buttherecamethecruelwinter，andthegrass—hopper，lookingaround，sawthathisfriends，theflowers，laydead，andknewtherebythathisownlittlespanwasdrawingnearitsclose。
Thenhefeltgladthathehadbeensohappy，andhadnotwastedhislife。"Ithasbeenveryshort，"saidhetohimself；"butithasbeenverypleasant，andIthinkIhavemadethebestuseofit。I
havedrunkinthesunshine，Ihavelainonthesoft，warmair，I
haveplayedmerrygamesinthewavinggrass，Ihavetastedthejuiceofthesweetgreenleaves。IhavedonewhatIcould。Ihavespreadmywings，Ihavesungmysong。NowIwillthankGodforthesunnydaysthatarepassed，anddie。"
Sayingwhich，hecrawledunderabrownleaf，andmethisfateinthewaythatallbravegrasshoppersshould；andalittlebirdthatwaspassingbypickedhimuptenderlyandburiedhim。
Nowwhenthefoolishantsawthis，shewasgreatlypuffedupwithPharisaicalconceit。"HowthankfulIoughttobe，"saidshe，"thatIamindustriousandprudent，andnotlikethispoorgrasshopper。
Whilehewasflittingaboutfromflowertoflower，enjoyinghimself，Iwashardatwork，puttingbyagainstthewinter。Nowheisdead，whileIamabouttomakemyselfcosyinmywarmhome，andeatallthegoodthingsthatIhavebeensavingup。"
But，asshespoke，thegardenercamealongwithhisspade，andlevelledthehillwhereshedwelttotheground，andleftherlyingdeadamidsttheruins。
Thenthesamekindlittlebirdthathadburiedthegrasshoppercameandpickedheroutandburiedheralso；andafterwardshecomposedandsangasong，theburthenofwhichwas，"Gatheryerosebudswhileyemay。"Itwasaveryprettysong，andaverywisesong，andamanwholivedinthosedays，andtowhomthebirds，lovinghimandfeelingthathewasalmostoneofthemselves，hadtaughttheirlanguage，fortunatelyoverhearditandwroteitdown，sothatallmayreadittothisday。
Unhappilyforus，however，Fateisaharshgoverness，whohasnosympathywithourdesireforrosebuds。"Don’tstoptopickflowersnow，mydear，"shecries，inhersharp，crosstones，assheseizesourarmandjerksusbackintotheroadway；"wehaven’ttimeto—day。
Wewillcomebackagainto—morrow，andyoushallpickthemthen。"
Andwehavetofollowher，knowing，ifweareexperiencedchildren，thatthechancesarethatweshallnevercomethatwayto—morrow；orthat，ifwedo，theroseswillbedead。
Fatewouldnothearofourhavingahouseboatthatsummer，——whichwasanexceptionallyfinesummer，——butpromisedusthatifweweregoodandsavedupourmoney，weshouldhaveonenextyear；andEthelberthaandI，beingsimple—minded，inexperiencedchildren，werecontentwiththepromise，andhadfaithinitssatisfactoryfulfilment。
AssoonaswereachedhomeweinformedAmendaofourplan。Themomentthegirlopenedthedoor，Ethelberthaburstoutwith：—"Oh！
canyouswim，Amenda？"
"No，mum，"answeredAmenda，withentireabsenceofcuriosityastowhysuchaquestionhadbeenaddressedtoher，"Ineverknewbutonegirlascould，andshegotdrowned。"
"Well，you’llhavetomakehasteandlearn，then，"continuedEthelbertha，"becauseyouwon’tbeabletowalkoutwithyouryoungman，you’llhavetoswimout。We’renotgoingtoliveinahouseanymore。We’regoingtoliveonaboatinthemiddleoftheriver。"
Ethelbertha’schiefobjectinlifeatthisperiodwastosurpriseandshockAmenda，andherchiefsorrowthatshehadneversucceededindoingso。Shehadhopedgreatthingsfromthisannouncement，butthegirlremainedunmoved。"Oh，areyou，mum，"shereplied；andwentontospeakofothermatters。
Ibelievetheresultwouldhavebeenthesameifwehadtoldherweweregoingtoliveinaballoon。
Idonotknowhowitwas，Iamsure。Amendawasalwaysmostrespectfulinhermanner。ButshehadaknackofmakingEthelberthaandmyselffeelthatwewereacoupleofchildren，playingatbeinggrownupandmarried，andthatshewashumouringus。
Amendastayedwithusfornearlyfiveyears——untilthemilkman，havingsavedupsufficienttobuya"walk"ofhisown，hadbecomepracticable——butherattitudetowardsusneverchanged。Evenwhenwecametobereallyimportantmarriedpeople，theproprietorsofa"family，"itwasevidentthatshemerelyconsideredwehadgoneastepfurtherinthegame，andwereplayingnowatbeingfathersandmothers。
Bysomesubtleprocessshecontrivedtoimbuethebabyalsowiththisidea。Thechildneverseemedtometotakeeitherofusquiteseriously。Shewouldplaywithus，orjoinwithusinlightconversation；butwhenitcametotheseriousaffairsoflife，suchasbathingorfeeding，shepreferredhernurse。
Ethelberthaattemptedtotakeheroutintheperambulatoronemorning，butthechildwouldnothearofitforamoment。
"It’sallright，babydear，"explainedEthelberthasoothingly。
"Baby’sgoingoutwithmammathismorning。"
"Ohno，babyain’t，"wasbaby’srejoinder，ineffectifnotinwords。"Babydon’ttakeahandinexperiments——notthisbaby。I
don’twanttobeupsetorrunover。"
PoorEthel！Ishallneverforgethowheart—brokenshewas。Itwasthewantofconfidencethatwoundedher。
Butthesearereminiscencesofotherdays，havingnoconnectionwiththedaysofwhichIam——orshouldbe——writing；andtowanderfromonemattertoanotheris，inatelleroftales，agrievoussin，andagrowingcustommuchtobecondemned。ThereforeIwillclosemyeyestoallothermemories，andendeavourtoseeonlythatlittlewhiteandgreenhouseboatbytheferry，whichwasthesceneofourfuturecollaborations。
HouseboatsthenwerenotbuilttothescaleofMississippisteamers，butthisboatwasasmallone，evenforthatprimitiveage。Themanfromwhomwehireditdescribeditas"compact。"Themantowhom，attheendofthefirstmonth，wetriedtosub—letit，characteriseditas"poky。"Inourletterswetraversedthisdefinition。Inourheartsweagreedwithit。
Atfirst，however，itssize——or，rather，itslackofsize——wasoneofitschiefcharmsinEthelbertha’seyes。Thefactthatifyougotoutofbedcarelesslyyouwerecertaintoknockyourheadagainsttheceiling，andthatitwasutterlyimpossibleforanymantoputonhistrousersexceptinthesaloon，sheregardedasacapitaljoke。
Thatsheherselfhadtotakealooking—glassandgoupontherooftodoherbackhair，shethoughtlessamusing。
Amendaacceptedhernewsurroundingswithherusualphilosophicindifference。Onbeinginformedthatwhatshehadmistakenforalinen—presswasherbedroom，sheremarkedthattherewasoneadvantageaboutit，andthatwas，thatshecouldnottumbleoutofbed，seeingtherewasnowheretotumble；and，onbeingshownthekitchen，sheobservedthatsheshouldlikeitfortwothings——onewasthatshecouldsitinthemiddleandreacheverythingwithoutgettingup；theother，thatnobodyelsecouldcomeintotheapartmentwhileshewasthere。
"Yousee，Amenda，"explainedEthelberthaapologetically，"weshallreallyliveoutside。"
"Yes，mum，"answeredAmenda，"Ishouldsaythatwouldbethebestplacetodoit。"
Ifonlywecouldhavelivedmoreoutside，thelifemighthavebeenpleasantenough，buttheweatherrendereditimpossible，sixdaysoutoftheseven，forustodomorethanlookoutofthewindowandfeelthankfulthatwehadaroofoverourheads。
Ihaveknownwetsummersbeforeandsince。IhavelearntbymanybitterexperiencesthedangerandfoolishnessofleavingtheshelterofLondonanytimebetweenthefirstofMayandthethirty—firstofOctober。Indeed，thecountryisalwaysassociateinmymindwithrecollectionsoflong，wearydayspassedinthepitilessrain，andsadeveningsspentinotherpeople’sclothes。ButneverhaveI
known，andnever，Ipraynightandmorning，mayIknowagain，suchasummerastheonewelivedthrough（thoughnoneofusexpectedto）
onthatconfoundedhouseboat。
Inthemorningwewouldbeawakenedbytherain’sforcingitswaythroughthewindowandwettingthebed，andwouldgetupandmopoutthesaloon。AfterbreakfastIwouldtrytowork，butthebeatingofthehailupontheroofjustovermyheadwoulddriveeveryideaoutofmybrain，and，afterawastedhourortwo，IwouldflingdownmypenandhuntupEthelbertha，andwewouldputonourmackintoshesandtakeourumbrellasandgooutforarow。Atmid—daywewouldreturnandputonsomedryclothes，andsitdowntodinner。
Intheafternoonthestormgenerallyfreshenedupabit，andwewerekeptprettybusyrushingaboutwithtowelsandcloths，tryingtopreventthewaterfromcomingintotheroomsandswampingus。
Duringtea—timethesaloonwasusuallyilluminatedbyforkedlightning。Theeveningswespentinbalingouttheboat，afterwhichwetookitinturnstogointothekitchenandwarmourselves。
Ateightwesupped，andfromthenuntilitwastimetogotobedwesatwrappedupinrugs，listeningtotheroaringofthethunder，andthehowlingofthewind，andthelashingofthewaves，andwonderingwhethertheboatwouldholdoutthroughthenight。
Friendswouldcomedowntospendthedaywithus——elderly，irritablepeople，fondofwarmthandcomfort；peoplewhodidnot，asarule，hankerafterjaunts，evenunderthemostfavourableconditions；butwhohadbeenpersuadedbyoursillytalkthatadayontheriverwouldbetothemlikeaSaturdaytoMondayinParadise。
Theywouldarrivesoaked；andwewouldshutthemupindifferentbunks，andleavethemtostripthemselvesandputonthingsofEthelbertha’sorofmine。ButEthelandI，inthosedays，wereslim，sothatstout，middle—agedpeopleinourclothesneitherlookedwellnorfelthappy。
Upontheiremergingwewouldtakethemintothesaloonandtrytoentertainthembytellingthemwhatwehadintendedtodowiththemhadthedaybeenfine。Buttheiranswerswereshort，andoccasionallysnappy，andafterawhiletheconversationwouldflag，andwewouldsitroundreadinglastweek’snewspapersandcoughing。
Themomenttheirownclothesweredry（welivedinaperpetualatmosphereofsteamingclothes）theywouldinsistuponleavingus，whichseemedtomediscourteousafterallthatwehaddoneforthem，andwoulddressthemselvesoncemoreandstartoffhome，andgetwetagainbeforetheygotthere。
Wewouldgenerallyreceivealetterafewdaysafterwards，writtenbysomerelative，informingusthatbothpatientsweredoingaswellascouldbeexpected，andpromisingtosendusacardforthefuneralincaseofarelapse。
Ourchiefrecreation，oursoleconsolation，duringthelongweeksofourimprisonment，wastowatchfromourwindowsthepleasure—seekerspassingbyinsmallopenboats，andtoreflectwhatanawfuldaytheyhadhad，orweregoingtohave，asthecasemightbe。
Intheforenoontheywouldheadupstream——youngmenwiththeirsweethearts；nephewstakingouttheirricholdaunts；husbandsandwives（someofthempairs，someofthemoddones）；stylish—lookinggirlswithcousins；energetic—lookingmenwithdogs；high—classsilentparties；low—classnoisyparties；quarrelsomefamilyparties—
—boatloadafterboatloadtheywentby，wet，butstillhopeful，pointingoutbitsofblueskytoeachother。
Intheeveningtheywouldreturn，drenchedandgloomy，sayingdisagreeablethingstooneanother。
Onecouple，andonecoupleonly，outofthemanyhundredsthatpassedunderourreview，camebackfromtheordealwithpleasantfaces。Hewasrowinghardandsinging，withahandkerchieftiedroundhisheadtokeephishaton，andshewaslaughingathim，whiletryingtoholdupanumbrellawithonehandandsteerwiththeother。
Therearebuttwoexplanationstoaccountforpeoplebeingjollyontheriverintherain。TheoneIdismissedasbeingbothuncharitableandimprobable。Theotherwascreditabletothehumanrace，and，adoptingit，Itookoffmycaptothisdampbutcheerfulpairastheywentby。Theyansweredwithawaveofthehand，andI
stoodlookingafterthemtilltheydisappearedinthemist。
Iaminclinedtothinkthatthoseyoungpeople，iftheybestillalive，arehappy。Maybe，fortunehasbeenkindtothem，ormaybeshehasnot，butineithereventtheyare，Iaminclinedtothink，happierthanaremostpeople。
Nowandagain，thedailytornadowouldragewithsuchfuryastodefeatitsownpurposebyprematurelyexhaustingitself。Ontheserareoccasionswewouldsitoutonthedeck，andenjoytheunwontedluxuryoffreshair。
Irememberwellthosefewpleasantevenings：theriver，luminouswiththedrownedlight，thedarkbankswherethenightlurked，thestorm—tossedsky，jewelledhereandtherewithstars。
Itwasdelightfulnottohearforanhourorsothesullenthrashingoftherain；buttolistentotheleapingofthefishes，thesoftswirlraisedbysomewater—rat，swimmingstealthilyamongtherushes，therestlesstwitteringsofthefewstillwakefulbirds。
Anoldcorncrakelivedneartous，andthewayheusedtodisturballtheotherbirds，andkeepthemfromgoingtosleep，wasshameful。Amenda，whowastown—bred，mistookhimatfirstforoneofthosecheapalarmclocks，andwonderedwhowaswindinghimup，andwhytheywentondoingitallnight；and，aboveall，whytheydidn’toilhim。
Hewouldbeginhisunhallowedperformanceaboutdusk，justaseveryrespectablebirdwaspreparingtosettledownforthenight。A
familyofthrusheshadtheirnestafewyardsfromhisstand，andtheyusedtogetperfectlyfuriouswithhim。
"There’sthatfoolatitagain，"thefemalethrushwouldsay；"whycan’thedoitintheday—timeifhemustdoitatall？"（Shespoke，ofcourse，intwitters，butIamconfidenttheaboveisacorrecttranslation。）
Afterawhile，theyoungthrusheswouldwakeupandbeginchirping，andthenthemotherwouldgetmadderthanever。
"Can’tyousaysomethingtohim？"shewouldcryindignantlytoherhusband。"Howdoyouthinkthechildrencangettosleep，poorthings，withthathideousrowgoingonallnight？Mightjustaswellbelivinginasaw—mill。"
Thusadjured，themalethrushwouldputhisheadoverthenest，andcalloutinanervous，apologeticmanner：—
"Isay，youknow，youthere，Iwishyouwouldn’tmindbeingquietabit。Mywifesaysshecan’tgetthechildrentosleep。It’stoobad，youknow，’ponmyworditis。"
"Goron，"thecorncrakewouldanswersurlily。"Youkeepyourwifeherselfquiet；that’senoughforyoutodo。"Andonhewouldgoagainworsethanbefore。
Thenamotherblackbird，fromalittlefurtheroff，wouldjoininthefray。
"Ah，it’sagoodhidinghewants，notatalkingto。AndifIwasacock，I’dgiveithim。"（Thisremarkwouldbemadeinatoneofwitheringcontempt，andwouldappeartobearreferencetosomepreviousdiscussion。）
"You’requiteright，ma’am，"Mrs。Thrushwouldreply。"That’swhatItellmyhusband，but"（withrisinginflection，sothateveryladyintheplantationmighthear）"HEwouldn’tmovehimself，blessyou——
no，notifIandthechildrenweretodiebeforehiseyesforwantofsleep。"
"Ah，heain’ttheonlyone，mydear，"theblackbirdwouldpipeback，"they’reallalike"；then，inavoicemoreofsorrowthanofanger：—
"butthere，itain’ttheirfault，Isuppose，poorthings。Ifyouain’tgotthespiritofabirdyoucan’thelpyourself。"
Iwouldstrainmyearsatthispointtohearifthemaleblackbirdwasmovedatallbythesetaunts，buttheonlysoundIcouldeverdetectcomingfromhisneighbourhoodwasthatofpalpablyexaggeratedsnoring。
Bythistimethewholegladewouldbeawake，expressingviewsconcerningthatcorncrakethatwouldhavewoundedalesscallousnature。
"Blowmetight，Bill，"somevulgarlittlehedge—sparrowwouldchirpout，inthemidstofthehubbub，"ifIdon’tbelievethegentthinks’e’sa—singing。"
"’Tain’t’isfault，"Billwouldreply，withmocksympathy。
"Somebody’sputapennyintheslot，and’ecan’tstop’isself。"
Irritatedbythelaughthatthiswouldcallforthfromtheyoungerbirds，thecorncrakewouldexerthimselftobemoreobjectionablethanever，and，asameanstothisend，wouldcommencegivinghismarvellousimitationofthesharpeningofarustysawbyasteelfile。
Butatthisanoldcrow，nottobetrifledwith，wouldcryoutangrily：—
"Stopthat，now。IfIcomedowntoyouI’llpeckyourcrankyheadoff，Iwill。"
Andthenwouldfollowsilenceforaquarterofanhour，afterwhichthewholethingwouldbeginagain。
CHAPTERV
BrownandMacShaughnassycamedowntogetherontheSaturdayafternoon；and，assoonastheyhaddriedthemselves，andhadhadsometea，wesettleddowntowork。
Jephsonhadwrittenthathewouldnotbeabletobewithusuntillateintheevening，andBrownproposedthatweshouldoccupyourselvesuntilhisarrivalwithplots。
"Leteachofus，"saidhe，"sketchoutaplot。Afterwardswecancomparethem，andselectthebest。"
Thisweproceededtodo。TheplotsthemselvesIforget，butI
rememberthatatthesubsequentjudgingeachmanselectedhisown，andbecamesoindignantatthebittercriticismtowhichitwassubjectedbytheothertwo，thathetoreitup；and，forthenexthalf—hour，wesatandsmokedinsilence。
WhenIwasveryyoungIyearnedtoknowotherpeople’sopinionofmeandallmyworks；now，mychiefaimistoavoidhearingit。Inthosedays，hadanyonetoldmetherewashalfalineaboutmyselfinanewspaper，IshouldhavetrampedLondontoobtainthatpublication。Now，whenIseeacolumnheadedwithmyname，I
hurriedlyfoldupthepaperandputitawayfromme，subduingmynaturalcuriositytoreaditbysayingtomyself，"Whyshouldyou？
Itwillonlyupsetyoufortheday。"
InmycubhoodIpossessedafriend。Otherfriendshavecomeintomylifesince——verydearandpreciousfriends——buttheyhavenoneofthembeentomequitewhatthisfriendwas。Becausehewasmyfirstfriend，andwelivedtogetherinaworldthatwasmuchbiggerthanthisworld——morefullofjoyandofgrief；and，inthatworld，welovedandhateddeeperthanweloveandhateinthissmallerworldthatIhavecometodwellinsince。
Healsohadtheveryyoungman’scravingtobecriticised，andwemadeitourcustomtoobligeeachother。Wedidnotknowthenthatwhatwemeant，whenweaskedfor"criticism，"wasencouragement。Wethoughtthatwewerestrong——onedoesatthebeginningofthebattle，andthatwecouldbeartohearthetruth。
Accordingly，eachonepointedouttotheotheronehiserrors，andthistaskkeptusbothsobusythatwehadnevertimetosayawordofpraisetooneanother。Thatweeachhadahighopinionoftheother’stalentsIamconvinced，butourheadswerefullofsillysaws。Wesaidtoourselves："Therearemanywhowillpraiseaman；
itisonlyhisfriendwhowilltellhimofhisfaults。"Also，wesaid："Nomanseeshisownshortcomings，butwhenthesearepointedouttohimbyanotherheisgrateful，andproceedstomendthem。"
Aswecametoknowtheworldbetter，welearntthefallacyoftheseideas。Butthenitwastoolate，forthemischiefhadbeendone。
Whenoneofushadwrittenanything，hewouldreadittotheother，andwhenhehadfinishedhewouldsay，"Now，tellmewhatyouthinkofit——franklyandasafriend。"
Thosewerehiswords。Buthisthoughts，thoughhemaynothaveknownthem，were：—
"Tellmeitiscleverandgood，myfriend，evenifyoudonotthinkso。Theworldisverycrueltothosethathavenotyetconqueredit，and，thoughwekeepacarelessface，ouryoungheartsarescoredwithwrinkles。Oftenwegrowwearyandfaint—hearted。Isitnotso，myfriend？Noonehasfaithinus，andinourdarkhourswedoubtourselves。Youaremycomrade。YouknowwhatofmyselfI
haveputintothisthingthattootherswillbebutanidlehalf—
hour’sreading。Tellmeitisgood，myfriend。Putalittleheartintome，Iprayyou。"
Buttheother，fullofthelustofcriticism，whichiscivilisation’ssubstituteforcruelty，wouldanswermoreinfranknessthaninfriendship。Thenhewhohadwrittenwouldflushangrily，andscornfulwordswouldpass。
Oneevening，hereadmeaplayhehadwritten。Therewasmuchthatwasgoodinit，buttherewerealsofaults（thereareinsomeplays），andtheseIseizeduponandmademerryover。IcouldhardlyhavedealtouttothepiecemoreunnecessarybitternesshadIbeenaprofessionalcritic。
AssoonasIpausedfrommysportherose，and，takinghismanuscriptfromthetable，toreitintwo，andflungitinthefire—
—hewasbutaveryyoungman，youmustremember——andthen，standingbeforemewithawhiteface，toldme，unsolicited，hisopinionofmeandofmyart。Afterwhichdoubleevent，itisperhapsneedlesstosaythatwepartedinhotanger。
Ididnotseehimagainforyears。Thestreetsoflifeareverycrowded，andifwelooseeachother’shandswearesoonhustledfarapart。WhenIdidnextmeethimitwasbyaccident。
IhadlefttheWhitehallRoomsafterapublicdinner，and，gladofthecoolnightair，wasstrollinghomebytheEmbankment。Aman，slouchingalongunderthetrees，pausedasIovertookhim。
"Youcouldn’tobligemewithalight，couldyou，guv’nor？"hesaid。
Thevoicesoundedstrange，comingfromthefigurethatitdid。
Istruckamatch，andhelditouttohim，shadedbymyhands。Asthefaintlightilluminedhisface，Istartedback，andletthematchfall：—
"Harry！"
Heansweredwithashortdrylaugh。"Ididn’tknowitwasyou，"hesaid，"orIshouldn’thavestoppedyou。"
"Howhasitcometothis，oldfellow？"Iasked，layingmyhanduponhisshoulder。Hiscoatwasunpleasantlygreasy，andIdrewmyhandawayagainasquicklyasIcould，andtriedtowipeitcovertlyuponmyhandkerchief。
"Oh，it’salong，story，"heansweredcarelessly，"andtooconventionaltobeworthtelling。Someofusgoup，youknow。Someofusgodown。You’redoingprettywell，Ihear。"
"Isupposeso，"Ireplied；"I’veclimbedafewfeetupagreasypole，andamtryingtostickthere。ButitisofyouIwanttotalk。Can’tIdoanythingforyou？"
Wewerepassingunderagas—lampatthemoment。Hethrusthisfaceforwardclosetomine，andthelightfellfullandpitilesslyuponit。
"DoIlooklikeamanyoucoulddoanythingfor？"hesaid。
Wewalkedoninsilencesidebyside，Icastingaboutforwordsthatmightseizeholdofhim。
"Youneedn’tworryaboutme，"hecontinuedafterawhile，"I’mcomfortableenough。WetakelifeeasilydownherewhereIam。
We’venodisappointments。"
"Whydidyougiveuplikeaweakcoward？"Iburstoutangrily。"Youhadtalent。Youwouldhavewonwithordinaryperseverance。"
"Maybe，"hereplied，inthesameeventoneofindifference。"I
supposeIhadn’tthegrit。Ithinkifsomebodyhadbelievedinmeitmighthavehelpedme。Butnobodydid，andatlastIlostbeliefinmyself。Andwhenamanlosesthat，he’slikeaballoonwiththegasletout。"
Ilistenedtohiswordsinindignationandastonishment。"Nobodybelievedinyou！"Irepeated。"Why，Ialwaysbelievedinyou，youknowthatI——"
ThenIpaused，rememberingour"candidcriticism"ofoneanother。
"Didyou？"herepliedquietly，"Ineverheardyousayso。Good—
night。"
InthecourseofourStrandwardwalkingwehadcometotheneighbourhoodoftheSavoy，and，ashespoke，hedisappeareddownoneofthedarkturningsthereabouts。
Ihastenedafterhim，callinghimbyname，butthoughIheardhisquickstepsbeforemeforalittleway，theyweresoonswallowedupinthesoundofothersteps，and，whenIreachedthesquareinwhichthechapelstands，Ihadlostalltraceofhim。
Apolicemanwasstandingbythechurchyardrailings，andofhimI
madeinquiries。
"Whatsortofagentwashe，sir？"questionedtheman。
"Atallthingentleman，veryshabbilydressed——mightbemistakenforatramp。"
"Ah，there’sagoodmanyofthatsortlivinginthistown，"repliedtheman。"I’mafraidyou’llhavesomedifficultyinfindinghim。"
ThusforasecondtimehadIheardhisfootstepsdieaway，knowingI
shouldneverlistenfortheirdrawingnearagain。
IwonderedasIwalkedon——Ihavewonderedbeforeandsince——whetherArt，evenwithacapitalA，isquiteworthallthesufferingthatisinflictedinherbehalf——whethersheandwearebetterforallthescorningandthesneering，alltheenvyingandthehating，thatisdoneinhername。
Jephsonarrivedaboutnineo’clockintheferry—boat。Weweremadeacquaintedwiththisfactbyhavingourheadsbumpedagainstthesidesofthesaloon。
Somebodyorotheralwayshadtheirheadbumpedwhenevertheferry—
boatarrived。Itwasaheavyandcumbersomemachine，andtheferry—
boywasnotagoodpunter。Headmittedthisfrankly，whichwascreditableofhim。Buthemadenoattempttoimprovehimself；thatis，wherehewaswrong。Hismethodwastoarrangethepuntbeforestartinginalinewiththepointtowardswhichhewishedtoproceed，andthentopushhard，withouteverlookingbehindhim，untilsomethingsuddenlystoppedhim。Thiswassometimesthebank，sometimesanotherboat，occasionallyasteamer，fromsixtoadozentimesadayourripariandwelling。Thatheneversucceededinstavingthehouseboatinspeakshighlyforthemanwhobuilther。
Onedayhecamedownuponuswithatremendouscrash。Amendawaswalkingalongthepassageatthemoment，andtheresulttoherwasthatshereceivedaviolentblowfirstontheleftsideofherheadandthenontheright。
Shewasaccustomedtoacceptonebumpasamatterofcourse，andtoregarditasanintimationfromtheboythathehadcome；butthisdoubleknockannoyedher：somuch"style"wasoutofplaceinamereferry—boy。Accordinglyshewentouttohiminastateofhighindignation。
"Whatdoyouthinkyouare？"shecried，balancingaccountsbyboxinghisearsfirstononesideandthenontheother，"atorpedo！Whatareyoudoinghereatall？Whatdoyouwant？"
"Idon’twantnothin’，"explainedtheboy，rubbinghishead；"I’vebroughtagentdown。"
"Agent？"saidAmenda，lookinground，butseeingnoone。"Whatgent？"
"Astoutgentinastraw’at，"answeredtheboy，staringroundhimbewilderedly。
"Well，whereishe？"askedAmenda。
"Idunno，"repliedtheboy，inanawedvoice；"’ewasa—standin’
there，attheotherendofthepunt，a—smokin’acigar。"
Justthenaheadappearedabovethewater，andaspentbutinfuriatedswimmerstruggledupbetweenthehouseboatandthebank。
"Oh，there’eis！"criedtheboydelightedly，evidentlymuchrelievedatthissatisfactorysolutionofthemystery；"’emustha’
tumbledoffthepunt。"
"You’requiteright，mylad，that’sjustwhathediddo，andthere’syourfeeforassistinghimtodoit。"Sayingwhich，mydrippingfriend，whohadnowscrambledupondeck，leantover，andfollowingAmenda’sexcellentexample，expressedhisfeelingsupontheboy’shead。
Therewasonecomfortingreflectionaboutthetransactionasawhole，andthatwasthattheferry—boyhadatlastreceivedafitandproperrewardforhisservices。Ihadoftenfeltinclinedtogivehimsomethingmyself。Ithinkhewas，withoutexception，themostclumsyandstupidboyIhaveevercomeacross；andthatissayingagooddeal。
Hismotherundertookthatforthree—and—sixpenceaweekheshould"makehimselfgenerallyuseful"tousforacoupleofhourseverymorning。
Thoseweretheoldlady’sverywords，andIrepeatedthemtoAmendawhenIintroducedtheboytoher。
"ThisisJames，Amenda，"Isaid；"hewillcomedownhereeverymorningatseven，andbringusourmilkandtheletters，andfromthentillninehewillmakehimselfgenerallyuseful。"
Amendatookstockofhim。
"Itwillbeachangeofoccupationforhim，sir，Ishouldsay，bythelookofhim，"sheremarked。
Afterthat，wheneversomemorethanusuallystirringcrashorblood—
curdlingbumpwouldcauseustoleapfromourseatsandcry："Whatonearthhashappened？"Amendawouldreply："Oh，it’sonlyJames，mum，makinghimselfgenerallyuseful。"
Whateverheliftedheletfall；whateverhetouchedheupset；
whateverhecamenear——thatwasnotafixture——heknockedover；ifitwasafixture，itknockedHIMover。Thiswasnotcarelessness：
itseemedtobeanaturalgift。Neverinhislife，Iamconvinced，hadhecarriedabucketfulofanythinganywherewithouttumblingoveritbeforehegotthere。Oneofhisdutieswastowatertheflowersontheroof。Fortunately——fortheflowers——Nature，thatsummer，stooddrinkswithalavishnesssufficienttosatisfythemostconfirmedvegetabletoper：otherwiseeveryplantonourboatwouldhavediedfromdrought。Neveronedropofwaterdidtheyreceivefromhim。Hewasforevertakingthemwater，butheneverarrivedtherewithit。Asaruleheupsetthepailbeforehegotitontotheboatatall，andthiswasthebestthingthatcouldhappen，becausethenthewatersimplywentbackintotheriver，anddidnoharmtoanyone。Sometimes，however，hewouldsucceedinlandingit，andthenthechanceswerehewouldspillitoverthedeckorintothepassage。Nowandagain，hewouldgethalfwayuptheladderbeforetheaccidentoccurred。Twicehenearlyreachedthetop；andonceheactuallydidgaintheroof。Whathappenedthereonthatmemorableoccasionwillneverbeknown。Theboyhimself，whenpickedup，couldexplainnothing。Itissupposedthathelosthisheadwiththeprideoftheachievement，andessayedfeatsthatneitherhisprevioustrainingnorhisnaturalabilitiesjustifiedhiminattempting。Howeverthatmaybe，thefactremainsthatthemainbodyofthewatercamedownthekitchenchimney；andthattheboyandtheemptypailarrivedtogetherondeckbeforetheyknewtheyhadstarted。
Whenhecouldfindnothingelsetodamage，hewouldgooutofhiswaytoupsethimself。Hecouldnotbesureofsteppingfromhisownpuntontotheboatwithsafety。Asoftenasnot，hewouldcatchhisfootinthechainorthepunt—pole，andarriveonhischest。
Amendausedtocondolewithhim。"Yourmotheroughttobeashamedofherself，"Iheardhertellinghimonemorning；"shecouldneverhavetaughtyoutowalk。Whatyouwantisago—cart。"
Hewasawillinglad，buthisstupiditywassuper—natural。Acometappearedintheskythatyear，andeverybodywastalkingaboutit。
Onedayhesaidtome：—
"There’sacometcoming，ain’tthere，sir？"Hetalkedaboutitasthoughitwereacircus。
"Coming！"Ianswered，"it’scome。Haven’tyouseenit？"
"No，sir。"
"Oh，well，youhavealookforitto—night。It’sworthseeing。"
"Yees，sir，Ishouldliketoseeit。It’sgotatail，ain’tit，sir？"
"Yes，averyfinetail。"
"Yees，sir，theysaidit’adatail。Wheredoyougotoseeit，sir？"
"Go！Youdon’twanttogoanywhere。You’llseeitinyourowngardenatteno’clock。"
Hethankedme，and，tumblingoverasackofpotatoes，plungedheadforemostintohispuntanddeparted。
Nextmorning，Iaskedhimifhehadseenthecomet。
"No，sir，Icouldn’tseeitanywhere。"
"Didyoulook？"
"Yees，sir。Ilookedalongtime。"
"Howonearthdidyoumanagetomissitthen？"Iexclaimed。"Itwasaclearenoughnight。Wheredidyoulook？"
"Inourgarden，sir。Whereyoutoldme。"
"Whereaboutsinthegarden？"chimedinAmenda，whohappenedtobestandingby；"underthegooseberrybushes？"
"Yees——everywhere。"
Thatiswhathehaddone：hehadtakenthestablelanternandsearchedthegardenforit。
Butthedaywhenhebrokeevenhisownrecordforfoolishnesshappenedaboutthreeweekslater。MacShaughnassywasstayingwithusatthetime，andontheFridayeveninghemixedusasalad，accordingtoarecipegivenhimbyhisaunt。OntheSaturdaymorning，everybodywas，ofcourse，veryill。EverybodyalwaysisveryillafterpartakingofanydishpreparedbyMacShaughnassy。
Somepeopleattempttoexplainthisfactbytalkinggliblyof"causeandeffect。"MacShaughnassymaintainsthatitissimplycoincidence。
"Howdoyouknow，"hesays，"thatyouwouldn’thavebeenillifyouhadn’teatenany？You’requeerenoughnow，anyonecansee，andI’mverysorryforyou；but，forallthatyoucantell，ifyouhadn’teatenanyofthatstuffyoumighthavebeenverymuchworse——perhapsdead。Inallprobability，ithassavedyourlife。"Andfortherestoftheday，heassumestowardsyoutheattitudeofamanwhohasdraggedyoufromthegrave。
ThemomentJimmyarrivedIseizedholdofhim。
"Jimmy，"Isaid，"youmustrushofftothechemist’simmediately。
Don’tstopforanything。Tellhimtogiveyousomethingforcolic——
theresultofvegetablepoisoning。Itmustbesomethingverystrong，andenoughforfour。Don’tforget，somethingtocounteracttheeffectsofvegetablepoisoning。Hurryup，oritmaybetoolate。"
Myexcitementcommunicateditselftotheboy。Hetumbledbackintohispunt，andpushedoffvigorously。Iwatchedhimland，anddisappearinthedirectionofthevillage。
Halfanhourpassed，butJimmydidnotreturn。Noonefeltsufficientlyenergetictogoafterhim。Wehadonlyjuststrengthenoughtositstillandfeeblyabusehim。Attheendofanhourwewereallfeelingverymuchbetter。Attheendofanhourandahalfweweregladhehadnotreturnedwhenheoughttohave，andwereonlycuriousastowhathadbecomeofhim。
Intheevening，strollingthroughthevillage，wesawhimsittingbytheopendoorofhismother’scottage，withashawlwrappedroundhim。Hewaslookingwornandill。
"Why，Jimmy，"Isaid，"what’sthematter？Whydidn’tyoucomebackthismorning？"
"Icouldn’t，sir，"Jimmyanswered，"Iwassoqueer。Mothermademegotobed。"
"Youseemedallrightinthemorning，"Isaid；"what’smadeyouqueer？"
"WhatMr。Jonesgiveme，sir：itupsetmeawful。"
Alightbrokeinuponme。
"Whatdidyousay，Jimmy，whenyougottoMr。Jones’sshop？"I
asked。
"Itold’imwhatyousaid，sir，that’ewastogivemesomethingtocounteracttheeffectsofvegetablepoisoning。Andthatitwastobeverystrong，andenoughforfour。"
"Andwhatdidhesay？"
"’Esaidthatwasonlyyournonsense，sir，andthatI’dbetterhaveenoughforonetobeginwith；andthen’easkedmeifI’dbeeneatinggreenapplesagain。"
"Andyoutoldhim？"
"Yees，sir，Itold’imI’d’adafew，and’esaiditservedmeright，andthat’e’opeditwouldbeawarningtome。Andthen’eputsomethingfizzyinaglassandtoldmetodrinkit。"
"Andyoudrankit？"
"Yees，sir。"
"Itneveroccurredtoyou，Jimmy，thattherewasnothingthematterwithyou——thatyouwereneverfeelingbetterinyourlife，andthatyoudidnotrequireanymedicine？"
"No，sir。"
"Didonesinglescintillaofthoughtofanykindoccurtoyouinconnectionwiththematter，Jimmy，frombeginningtoend？"
"No，sir。"
PeoplewhonevermetJimmydisbelievethisstory。Theyarguethatitspremisesareindisaccordwiththeknownlawsgoverninghumannature，thatitsdetailsdonotsquarewiththeaverageofprobability。PeoplewhohaveseenandconversedwithJimmyacceptitwithsimplefaith。
TheadventofJephson——whichItrustthereaderhasnotentirelyforgotten——cheeredusupconsiderably。Jephsonwasalwaysathisbestwhenallotherthingswereattheirworst。ItwasnotthathestruggledinMarkTapleyfashiontoappearmostcheerfulwhenmostdepressed；itwasthatpettymisfortunesandmishapsgenuinelyamusedandinspiritedhim。Mostofuscanrecallourunpleasantexperienceswithamusedaffection；Jephsonpossessedtherobusterphilosophythatenabledhimtoenjoyhisduringtheiractualprogress。Hearriveddrenchedtotheskin，chucklinghugelyattheideaofhavingcomedownonavisittoahouseboatinsuchweather。
Underhiswarminginfluence，thehardlinesonourfacesthawed，andbysuppertimewewere，asallEnglishmenandwomenwhowishtoenjoylifeshouldbe，independentoftheweather。
Lateron，asifdisheartenedbyourindifference，therainceased，andwetookourchairsoutonthedeck，andsatwatchingthelightning，whichstillplayedincessantly。Then，notunnaturally，thetalkdriftedintoasombrechannel，andwebeganrecountingstories，dealingwiththegloomyandmysterioussideoflife。
Someofthesewereworthremembering，andsomewerenot。TheonethatleftthestrongestimpressiononmymindwasatalethatJephsontoldus。
Ihadbeenrelatingasomewhatcuriousexperienceofmyown。ImetamanintheStrandonedaythatIknewverywell，asIthought，thoughIhadnotseenhimforyears。WewalkedtogethertoCharingCross，andthereweshookhandsandparted。Nextmorning，Ispokeofthismeetingtoamutualfriend，andthenIlearnt，forthefirsttime，thatthemanhaddiedsixmonthsbefore。
ThenaturalinferencewasthatIhadmistakenonemanforanother，anerrorthat，nothavingagoodmemoryforfaces，Ifrequentlyfallinto。Whatwasremarkableaboutthematter，however，wasthatthroughoutourwalkIhadconversedwiththemanundertheimpressionthathewasthatotherdeadman，and，whetherbycoincidenceornot，hisreplieshadneveroncesuggestedtomemymistake。
AssoonasIfinished，Jephson，whohadbeenlisteningverythoughtfully，askedmeifIbelievedinspiritualism"toitsfullestextent。"
"Thatisratheralargequestion，"Ianswered。"Whatdoyoumeanby’spiritualismtoitsfullestextent’？"
"Well，doyoubelievethatthespiritsofthedeadhavenotonlythepowerofrevisitingthisearthattheirwill，butthat，whenhere，theyhavethepowerofaction，orrather，ofexcitingtoaction？
Letmeputadefinitecase。Aspiritualistfriendofmine，asensibleandbynomeansimaginativeman，oncetoldmethatatable，throughthemediumofwhichthespiritofafriendhadbeeninthehabitofcommunicatingwithhim，cameslowlyacrosstheroomtowardshim，ofitsownaccord，onenightashesatalone，andpinionedhimagainstthewall。Nowcananyofyoubelievethat，orcan’tyou？"
"Icould，"Browntookituponhimselftoreply；"but，beforedoingso，Ishouldwishforanintroductiontothefriendwhotoldyouthestory。Speakinggenerally，"hecontinued，"itseemstomethatthedifferencebetweenwhatwecallthenaturalandthesupernaturalismerelythedifferencebetweenfrequencyandrarityofoccurrence。
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